My Biggest Distractions & Best Motivations

I imagined jumping right into Grad school once I graduated with my Bachelor's degree. But low & behold, I moved to Charleston, got married and found a job to, you know, figure out what I wanted to do. Just 6 months after graduating, we found out we were moving to Germany. Job & school halted, just like that. And I was content with that. 

We had Greyson in Germany and made the decision to stay home with him instead of returning to work. I barely made enough for the expensive childcare & it simply wasn't worth it at the time. 

Fast-forward to 2015 - big changes were in store for us. We moved back stateside to Colorado, I got a new job & started Grad school. Then found out I was pregnant again! While we were ecstatic, I was also sort of nervous about what that would do to my plans. 

I continued to work throughout my pregnancy, up until the week before my due date (since my boss was convinced I'd have her there if I kept going). I also still took classes and worked on training to be a teaching assistant. I was sitting in recitation the morning I had Olivia, ignoring the contractions to grade student speeches. #dedication 

Somehow, I managed to take several more classes and return to work since she was born. I wake up early to take care of her and Greyson, spend my days running around usually busy, rushing home for dinner & to spend as much time with my little family before squeezing in some school work at night (when I'm in class) before passing out to repeat the same thing the next day. 

I say my family is my biggest distraction because at any given time, I would 100% rather be doing anything with them. To hand off the baby to my husband in order to have 2 hands to type a paper, not the easiest thing for me. To sacrifice doing bedtime and reading books with Greyson in order to post on discussion boards, fills me with regret. 

Then I look at them. I watch them sleeping in a little pile as I sit at the dining room table, typing away and see why I do it. They are my motivation. Of course I want it all. I want my Masters. I want a career. But I want it for them. 

I want to show my kids how to work hard. Push through the struggles. Set goals for themselves and not let anything get in the way. Strive for what seems like is the impossible. I want to help support our family in the best ways I can. I want a job I enjoy so I can come home and not be in a bad mood from it. 

I had the best role models growing up, mostly my amazing mom. And I want to be that for my kids. For my husband. For us. 

So even though the days are long, I keep trucking on and can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I am just about half way done with my program and am getting eager to graduate (hopefully) in the Spring.